07-31-2009
A Cinderella Story Reckless Self-Abandon, ‘even when the shoe (or flip flop) doesn’t fit’ Many of us have been inspired by Random Acts of Kindness or ARC: Acts of Random Caring. The times someone pays for a stranger’s toll who is in the line behind them in traffic (prior to the days of toll-tags), or lets someone go in front of them at the grocery store, or even cut in front of them while trying to merge into one lane on a busy highway are only a few such examples. There are varying degrees of such acts but one common denominator is the selfless motive of the heart. These big hearts are often demonstrated to us in little bodies. Vegas Summer- you know the song… Hot, Hot, Hot! There are only a few ways to escape the 111 degree heat, thus I promised my own four kids, and several of their friends, that I would take them to the neighborhood pool. It seemed like it took forever just to get eight kids out the door with sunscreen, beach towels, goggles, styrofoam noodles, water bottles, and floaties for the little ones. After Jac took his shoes off a million times I wanted to duct tape them to his feet. Alas, we were finally en route, walking the 100 yards to the pool, when I heard a whince. Looking down, regretting having forgone my duct tape idea, I saw that Jac (typical of a
Texas boy) had removed his shoes yet again. Knowing the challenge of me as ‘Octo-mom’ turning the crowd around and heading back seemed a greater obstacle than braving the flaming hot coals that might torch my feet on the black asphalt. Thus, I quickly took off my sandals and gave them to Jac. Immediately I was confronted as to my mis-calculation of my own capacity to withstand the blistering cement indicative of the Heat-miser’s wrath.
Not wanting to alarm the group of young’ns as to my pain (or really not to appear wimpy); I proceeded toward the pool as if I was only playfully imitating a popcorn kernel on a hot stove. The children giggled and Brooke said, “Mommy you are so silly!” Yet, there was one set of intuitive eyes in the crowd who wasn’t buying it for one second ~ four year old Tony. He watched me with a knowing cognition that communicated proficiently that I was in no way deluding him. Instantaneously, he took off his miniature sized flip flops, threw them towards my feet and jetted off in a sprint reminiscent of Dash from the Incredibles. As he raced toward the grassy area by the pool I hollered (
Texas term) after him to please put his shoes back on and that I was fine. He never looked back. When I approached the plush green landscape where he awaited, his smile beamed brighter than the luminescent desert sun. With reverential awe I thanked him for his pure heart and utter selflessness, “I think that was the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me Tony.” His radiant eyes sparkled as he dismissed my heroic praise citing, “Ahhh, it was nothing, it didn’t even feel hot to me!”
As I humbly reflected upon his actions, I realized that Tony (St. Anthony to me), did not pause for one second to see how he would be affected, rather he saw a need and did what he thought would meet that need for another. There is a time, in most adult lives, when we acquiesce to selfless abandon that sacrifices our own needs in order to help another. We all too often succumb to a fearful world-view ensnared with disquietude. We don’t answer the door when a stranger knocks; we don’t let our kids ride their bike in our own neighborhood; we quit stopping to help a stranded person having car trouble. That’s when God uses his little saints, so pure in heart to remind us of our calling. Unlike Prince Charming, this member of a royal priesthood did not return what first belonged to someone else, he offered up that which was his- two times over! We are all called to serve, to live as neighbors willing to sacrifice our own needs for those of another, to humbly surrender our own agendas, schedules or busy-ness in response to God’s invitation to love in the present moment. We are challenged to do so fearlessly, with reckless, relentless self-abandon. The metaphorical slipper, or in this case flip flop, might not have fit, yet the heart of the young prince (prophet) revealed the kind of footsteps I want to follow in. He who is the Prince of Peace, The King of Kings, who wore not a crown of jewels but instead a crown of thorns. Sometimes the littlest feet are the hardest footsteps to fill, let those be the shoes I strive to emulate today.
Personal Note: I can’t thank you enough for your many expressions of encouragement during my newsletter hiatus. Although it appears I have taken a sabbatical, transversely I have been working to complete my masters in Theology (which I hope to conclude this Fall). With that said, I apologize for my lack of correspondence and am hoping you subscribe to the ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder’ ideology ~ forever we are joined in heart and prayer! All God’s Blessings and Love,Tammy
Spiritual Fitness Calendar Updates: (I hope to see you at one of the upcoming events!) September 24-27: Imago Dei International Conference : Life in the Desert, Thirsting for Oasis www.CALGMConference.org
Las Vegas,
Nevada
October 24-25:
University of
Dallas Ministry Conference: Walking Together in Faith
Dallas,
Texas http://www.udministryconference.com/
November 6-8: The Pines Catholic Camp: Women’s ONLY Weekend, JUST BREATHE… has been rescheduled for November 6-8! Join us for some female spirit, mind, body and soul nourishment! Come and just be! http://www.thepines.org/programs/?c= November 19-21 :National Federation of Catholic Youth Conference,
Kansas City, Kansas
http://www.nfcym.org/ncyc/2007/index.htm Facebook:I also have recently joined the face-book generation and look forward to connecting with those of you who are also cyber space friends! Brooke’s Hoedown Throwdown:And this is just too fun to pass up…I accredit all of the singing and dance moves to Brooke’s awesome cousin Sami! Warning…the song is totally addicting! Here is Brooke Ryan Amosson’s YouTube debut:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGdRw3GDang (Video 1) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gBZjwFsg3gY&feature=related (Video 2)
Tammy Amosson Spiritual Fitness Ministry
amosson1@cox.net www.tammyamosson.com
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11-05-2008
Freedom to Love
I was once told that if I wanted to keep peace in my relationships I should never talk about religion or politics- so with that said: WARNING: “This message might contain radical, controversial material with dangerous concepts such as peace, unity and love.” Continue reading at your own discretion…
Is peace really possible if we don’t allow ourselves to even discuss the topics that seem to ignite such passion in us? By allowing for the conversation we are immediately invited into a deeper understanding of another person’s ideology, what they value, what is contained in their belief system. We don’t necessarily have to agree with it (it’s not all about me, darn-it), or disagree, (I’m right though), but we can listen without judgment, or condemnation, or without the distractive voices in our head plotting our rebuttal to their idiotic, misguided, wrong thoughts. Rather, it is through listening, we open ourselves up to an unending opportunity of possibilities; new ideas, a broader perspective, enhanced understanding, deeper compassion, and perhaps, if we are truly open- enlightenment. When we listen in this way we are better able to honor another person’s unique spiritual journey. How tragic would it be if I discounted another person’s experience of God (perhaps trying to get them to think like me); I would miss out on a sacred exchange of soul sharing.
In case you haven’t heard, there is some sort of political election on the horizon. Sadly, many of us have witnessed (and have long since grown tired of) the demonizing attacks, hurtful commentaries, slanderous literature, venomous remarks, and unhealthy, hurtful comments being slung (and that’s just me in my own head). As I was driving my son to school the other day, an advertisement came on the radio for one of the political candidates. The commercial, instead of highlighting the candidate’s attributes, criticized his opponent’s defects. My young child looked at me quizzically; his forehead wrinkled in a perplexed expression and innocently asked, “Mom, why are they so mean to each other?”
It saddens me even moreso that both candidates profess openly their Christian faith, and yet, most often, it seems their own are drawing lines, choosing sides and casting stones (unlike Jesus example- “he who is without sin cast the first stone”). Have we as Christians interchanged casting a stone with casting a ballot? Or, are we simultaneously casting a stone with our vote? Instead, God invites all of us into a relational journey of LOVE. He calls us to, “Love our neighbor”. That means that both John McCain, and Barack Obama, are our neighbor, and even more so, they are our brothers in Christ. We are called to love them, not with a pitying love, or a condescending love, or an “I’ll pray for (at) you” kind of love; not a love that is used as a weapon, but a love that is first reflected to us by our Father, the way He loves us, perfectly, without condition.
As a people of God, (One Nation Under GOD) we have the opportunity to unite (The UNITED States, not the Divided States) together in a union based on love and peace. Our nation has given us the FREEdom to worship the God of our understanding. Our God has given us the FREE Will to love Him, and by doing so, we love our neighbor. This kind of love, this kind of FREEdom, is not an obligatory mandate; rather it is an open invitation whereby we are FREE to LOVE.
As believers our ultimate leader is… ‘In God we trust’. He who has the power to move mountains, to change hearts, to make the blind see and the deaf hear; He, who calls, not the greatest, but the least. Jesus did not call Caesar to spread the good news, instead he called a fisherman. God did not call an articulate prophetic speaker to free his people from bondage; instead he called a stuttering orphan. Jesus did not call the most peaceful prophet to spread His name; rather he called the biggest persecutor of His people. God did not call the epitome of morality to build an ark; No, He called an incestuous drunk. God chose His only begotten son to come into the world, not by way of cloud, but through an unwed pregnant teenager. Tuesday is not a football game that will leave us with a winner or a loser, the good guys or the bad guys (or girl); rather it can challenge us to go out into the world with more fervor and zeal than before. We are called as apostolic witnesses not to sit back and watch others make changes, or become frustrated with changes we wish they would make. Rather, we are called to be the change we want to see. So, with each person we encounter, each mouth we feed, each neighbor we clothe, each hand we extend in peace, each smile we offer, each opportunity we have for Christ daily – may we be that much more faithfully committed. It is our responsibility, our call, to work for justice, love kindness, and walk humbly with our God (Micah 6:8). Our God is an awesome God, who gives hope, is full of goodness and provides light to the Nations, (One Nation Under God); He gives peace to His people whom he offers daily the everlasting, open-ended invitation to unite together with the FREEDOM to LOVE!
My name is Tammy Amosson and I approve this message!
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11-05-2008
Picture Perfect
or Beautiful Soul
Last week my oldest child came home from school with a familiar form, ahhh yes, time for school pictures. I have come to both appreciate and rely on the school’s willingness to commemorate my child’s yearly mug shot. I don’t miss the stressful days of taking him to a photographer and jumping up and down frantically waving my hands in the air like circus clown, all in hopes to illicit any morsel of a smile from a disenchanted toddler. It usually ended with a melt down and hysterics until the photo store manager would ask me to calm down. Grrrrrr~ the stress and pressure of having to be PICTURE PERFECT!
As I was filling out the order form (and signing away his college fund), I paused when I got to the box that read, “photo touch-up”. Next to it was a picture of a boy with acne and beside it was the same picture only acne free (If only life were such that we could so easily erase our blemishes). My stomach knotted, “What kind of messages are we sending our youth”? Isn’t it hard enough to feel good about oneself without the added pressure of having to be, act and look perfect? Part of the fun of getting older is looking back at our ridiculous class photos and laughing hysterically. My dad still carries my second grade picture in his wallet. I am sitting next to the Liberty Bell and grinning so big you can’t even see my eyes (okay, I still do that), but the gap in-between my two front teeth looked like Moses parted the red sea a second time. Embarrassing photos are a right of passage, what will we have to threaten our children with on their wedding day slide show? For my generation, it was feathered Farrah wings, spray on Sun-In peroxide that miraculously transformed ones natural hair color to a brassy, fried, burnt orange; frizzy perms, and back-picked big hair with so much hairspray Donald Trump would be proud (that was before the whole less is more concept). Now, as my hair turns gray and my body aches just getting out of bed, I look to these pictures for encouragement reminding me of the many reasons I don’t want to go backwards in time. Bring on the dentures baby~ full steam ahead!
The challenge for all us is that we live in a world where cosmetic companies are constantly deceiving us with convoluted messages equating our value with our looks. And yet, God’s revelation tells us that our worth is based on unconditional, eternal & internal (The Holy Spirit), everlasting love! I have yet to hear that claim from a product. Consumers are continuously fed false promises of miracle crèmes to cover up our flaws. Once I received a product called ‘disaster cream’ as a gift (not really sure how to take that, ummmm thank you????). We are bombarded by retailers telling (SELLING) us the latest and greatest new thing to make us look and feel better. That, however, is not what Jesus tells us. He invites us to walk with Him in our not so perfect self. He does not give us false promises of a ‘perfect’ life, or body, but He does promise He will not abandon us on our imperfect journey.
I think Jesus would want me to care less about a pedicure and more about washing my neighbors feet; He would want me to celebrate my baby tattoos (a.k.a. stretch-marks) and pray for the woman struggling with infertility (who would give anything for those holy markings). He would want me to spend less time piercing my body and spend more time with He who was pierced for me, and with His body, my neighbor. He would hope that I would care less about a bad haircut and more about my neighbor who is losing his in chemotherapy (suddenly hair seems very inconsequential). He would want me to forget enhancement surgeries and care more about enhancing my friend’s spirit after her mastectomy (further reminding us how unimportant ‘perfect’ really is).
Jesus’ disciples first recognized Him after His resurrection, not by His silky smooth ‘herbal essence conditioned’ hair glistening with radiant shimmer in the Galilean sunlight (not so much). Rather, they recognized Him by his wounds. Our scars tell our stories. My 6’3 husband has a scar on his chin from ….wait for it - a tricycle incident. It makes me smile every time I visualize this now 200+ muscular frame~ on a tricycle! That scar is one of many beautiful things about him.
I believe Jesus wants us to celebrate freckles, wrinkles, crooked smiles, braces, blemishes, and stretch-marks, all of which become our tattoos of life. Beauty is not contained in an outer garment, but rather is an expression of ones heart. “The Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart” (1 Sam. 16:7). The great creator formed us perfectly imperfect, formed in His perfect image and likeness. The master potter molded each of us in a unique and extra-ordinary way- His way! God does not wish for us to be ‘picture perfect’, but rather, He calls us to be BEAUTIFUL SOULS.
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08-20-2008
Retard = Caring, Sharing & Hugging There has been some recent press over the newly released movie “Tropic Thunder”. I will confess, I don’t usually pay much attention to the new releases since there will never be anything equivalent to the caliber of Barney. That purple dinosaur really knows what’s important in life ~ caring, sharing, and hugging! It has come to my attention that the main character in the movie (played by Ben Stiller~ my brothers loved him in Night at the Museum) is named Jack (spelled wrong). They refer to him as ‘Simple Jack – the retard’. I even heard the movie‘s marketing campaign is selling mass quantities of t-shirts with that slogan. Personally, I can think of several things that money could be better spent on, such as feeding the hungry and finding a cure for seizure disorders.
· I have heard a lot of people use the word ‘retard’ and it seems more and more popular. I only recently was told that it is often used to make fun of someone or in a derogatory way. I was confused since my family has always taught me that retard means; “holy, wonderful, child of God”. So, I looked it up and here is what is in the dictionary: 1. to make slow; delay the development or progress of (an action, process, etc.); hinder or impede. As I read the definition, I couldn’t help but agree with what my family has told me that ‘retard’ is a good thing. People in the world around me seem to be moving so fast all the time, the fact that I have been given the gift of being able to slow down, not hurry up; to be still and listen instead of being constantly surrounded by noise; to be able to be present in each moment and appreciate every breath I take and every song I hear Barney sing. No matter what I am doing, I always have time for caring, sharing and hugging. I definitely see why me being ‘retarded’ is a good thing. So even if there are people who don’t get it and perhaps might even make fun of it (forgive them Lord, they know not what they do) I just think they might need more hugs.
I I wish for you a day of slowing down not speeding up, of delaying the hurry and making time for being still, for listening to the birds instead of the TV, for laughing with friends, smiling at strangers, and always having time for caring, sharing and hugging! In the words of my great mentor Barney, “With a great big hug, and a kiss from me to you… never forget I love you” (I changed the last part, but I do love you)!
Namaste,
Jac Labeled by this world: globally delayed, speech disabled, autistic, epileptic, special needs, hypotonic, mentally retardedLabeled by God: my holy son, my prophet, my saint, my beloved child, the perfection of love~ perfect exactly as I made you! More thoughts by Jac are available in Special Angel: Through the Eyes of Jac. Copies can be ordered through his biggest fan –his mom! http://icydk.com/2008/08/05/ben-stillers-movie-in-disability-fight/http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=retard
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08-20-2008
Wrestling with the Past, Present and FutureOne week ago today I was sitting at the Piazza in St. Peter’s Square (
Vatican City). Together, with my fellow classmates and professors from the
School of
Ministry at The University of Dallas, and 10,000+ pilgrims from all over the world ~ we awaited the homilist, Pope Benedict XVI.
(1). Before me, erected on the altar of the audience hall, was a massive bronze structure that looked like something from the Medieval period (even though it was completed in 1977). The sculpture depicts the Risen Christ entangled in a sea of web like vines. It looks as though a fierce wind is violently tussling His hair in tornadic wildness. His legs are entombed by wild tree branches attempting to imprison His lower body in a shell of and skull like images. The artist, Pericle Fazzini, was attempting to create an image of the church as she wrestles with the tension between her past, present and future. (2) As I pondered the image before me I felt an intense surge of emotion. I began to contemplate the mysteries of the seen and unseen, the human and divine, despair and hope, falling and rising, suffering and healing, defeat and triumph, death and new life, finite and infinite. I found myself relating to her (church) struggle; the humanness of trying… falling… learning… reconciling… and trying again. As I meditated on these concepts I became painfully aware of a negative emotion that was erupting within. No matter how hard I tried to stuff it, it was of no use, it purged to the surface in all its ugliness… resentment. I had a resentment with her. Over the course of several years I have heard many accounts of people who have been hurt by what I attributed to her insensitivity, and when my brothers and sisters hurt-so do I. The epiphany I had was that in talking about her, I realized I was talking about me. Now I was faced with the accountability that as a member of the same apostolic community Jesus first commissioned Peter, Paul and the rest of the apostles to serve in, I am called in the same way. That means I can’t point fingers, I have to take action. I am part of a family, made up of broken people who are at times capable of hurting one another. And yet, here I was requiring her to be perfect. How could she be? I am a member, thus I just brought imperfection into the mix. This community, body of believers, church family is made up of imperfect humans whose only source of perfection is the God they worship. I realized I can no longer be mad at (resent, or blame) her. (Sheesh this forgiveness stuff is tough!) I am accountable to be the healing I seek by way of word, action and deed. If I hunger for peace, I have to be willing to sacrifice for justice. If I desire healing, I have to be vulnerable to suffering. If I know someone with a wound, I am called to seek reconciliation. I am not a helpless, voiceless member of a family imprisoned by frustration. Rather, I am a present day apostle called to follow in the footsteps of my Father who says, “Come, follow me, do as I have shown you, I go before you always.” Sometimes I forget that the family I belong to gets to be imperfect, God allows us that, even forgives us, even though He Himself is perfect. Slowly my resentment began to dissipate and my heart filled with compassion. I became infused with hope and an overwhelming desire to serve in whatever way I am needed. We are currently living in an exciting time. The church today has more historical, archeological, scriptural and theological knowledge than ever before. She is currently equipping her members, both lay and ordained, in ways inconceivable to the early church. She is continuously learning from the past, seeking to meet the concerns of the present, and forever planting seeds of faith for a promised future. Wrestling with tensions of the past, present and future is healthy insomuch as it keeps us seeking navigation from the one who can help us keep the course - the Holy Spirit. Thus, it is with great enthusiasm (with the spirit) and zeal that we can continue the work of He who is perfect love. He who was, is and always will be; The great I AM, who is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. He, who is the True Presence, who calls us in continuation of His apostolic commissioning to love and serve our neighbor and the One who is the constant of the past, present and future! I hope you will be able to take advantage of the incredible opportunity to study in
Rome. I highly recommend the program at the
School of
Ministry (credit, audit, or just attendee options). To find out more information go to: http://www.udallas.edu/ministry/summerinstitute.cfm All God’s blessings, Together in Him, Tammy
——————–(1) Background information on Papal Audience :
Brian Schmisek, Ph.D, and
John Norris Ph.D ; http://www.vatican.va/holy_father/benedict_xvi/audiences/index.htm.(2) Reference information on Fazzini :
Brian Schmisek, Ph.D, and
John Norris Ph.D Archivio della scuola Romana: Arte a Roma tra le due guerre, Pericle Fazzini, http://www.scuolaroman.it/artisit/fazzini.htmP.S. For those of you who have a hurt with her (us), I am so sorry. I hope in time you will be open to forgive her (us). “For they (we) know not what they do.” We do love you, in our imperfect, sometimes hurtful way. We are truly sorry.
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08-11-2008
Spiritual Fitness Colossal Indulgence vs. Spiritual FreedomThere are many emotions that erupt walking through the historical streets of
Rome, but as I made this recent journey, perhaps none quite so gut wrenching for me as touring Vespasian Flavius’s famous Amphitheatre (known today as the Coliseum). This palatial structural, erected with tiered arches and once coated with Pentelic marble and imperial statues, is truly an archeological masterpiece. As I peered upward at the colossal landmark it was as if I could almost transcend time and hear the echoing chants of an overstuffed crowd impregnated with the unquenchable, gluttonous lust for food, drink, and vengeful bloodshed. I remember experiencing a similar sick feeling while touring a holocaust memorial. I just could not fathom such demonic disregard for the value of human life.
As we listened to our awesome tour guides ~ (1. shout out to the amazing professors Dr. John Norris and Dr. Brian Schmisek at the
School of
Ministry U.D.) expound upon the historic happenings in the coliseum, my heart sickened. They explained how the floor of the coliseum would have continuously been coated with sand, of course, how else would they soak up all the blood? The tragic history of martyrdoms, and murderous acts that took place in the arena coupled with the fact that the emperor gave the Roman people the stadium as a gift deemed for the sport of killing just seemed too barbaric to believe (couldn’t someone have suggested a symphony?). Still in utter disgust at how human beings could act so inhumanely, my thoughts turned to modern day practices and I grew increasingly disturbed as I couldn’t help but draw some uncomfortable parallels.
I don’t have to go far from my home town of
Las Vegas to confirm this revelation. Tickets are both expensive and hard to come by for those seeking various kinds of entertainment that includes hitting, punching, and tackling another person in the name of sport. An especially huge draw in this town is an event whereby the winner is determined by one opponent knocking the other one out; most often both athletes are bruised and bloodied (FYI~ kick-boxing a punching bag is not the same thing!). In addition, one of the most celebrated pastimes in America involves a crowd gathering at a coliseum (Hmm…ever thought where that name came from?) and cheering as men hit one another in competition for a ball; often times, excessive food and drink is part of the experience. The coliseum itself was built with slanted interior walls that became notorious as vomitoriums, thus when people had filled their stomach they could purge and start again. I currently live in the city that is known for its elaborate buffets, so many that they could probably feed a 3rd world country for a year with what they serve in one day. What might not be as commonly known is this same city happens to have one of the highest percentages of homeless and hungry people living in it. How is it possible that a city so oversaturated with food and excess could have so many starving people? Again, uncomfortable parallels. Although Russell Crowe and
Hollywood together managed to romanticize the Gladiatorial games, the reality is that two people entered the Coliseum and only one came out alive. You don’t have to live in the Vegas to know those are not good odds. I have heard the same uncomfortable analogous relationship made of two people entering an abortion clinic with the same result. Women attending the Roman games were perched at the top of the arena waiting to service yet another lustful indulgence in exchange for money. This is especially uncomfortable since the city I live in is notorious for pornography and prostitution readily available per request. What do all of the above have in common? All legally protected by their governing political systems. When it comes to animals, I can’t even watch Bambi without crying, thus I can’t fathom watching animals slaughtered for sport. Fortunately, in modern society, we don’t partake in such atrocious animal cruelty… Oh wait, that’s right~ lest we forget Michael Vick and the entourage of patrons like him who instigate such venomous displays of unbridled animalistic behavior. I don’t contest the innate sense of competition that seems part of the human condition, and I won’t deny my own willful desire not just to play, but to win. I confess that I do find pleasure annihilating
Dobie Moser on the tennis court or at the ping pong table and winning a bet against Mike Patin when the Cowboys beat the Saints. I enjoy nachos while cheering on the Texas Rangers, and I jump up and down and scream at the TV with the rest of my family when Tony Romo nails a pass in the end-zone. I am not dissing the obvious pleasures associated with sports. It seems almost spiritual to cheer for good over evil, the underdog to beat the odds, and there is no denying the elated high that ensues after a victory. Many of us got chills just watching the athletes process in during the opening ceremonies of the Olympics- colossal coolness! So how do we differentiate between celebrating skill and sportsmanship vs. desensitizing ourselves to violence? Television, movies, and video games are constantly exposing explicit graphic images of bloodshed. The growing number of drive by shootings, gang violence, and school massacres is evidence of its negative effect. And yet, in all of this bad news, there is Good News! We, in our human condition, have a unique power source unlike any other, something that separates us distinctly from impulsive animalistic behavior~ it helps us discern right from wrong, good vs. bad and sacred vs. sinful ~ it is the Holy Spirit!!! The Holy Spirit inspires gifted athletes to donate thousands of dollars for charitable purposes (2. Andre Agassi); those who advocate and raise money for diseases (3. Dan Marino-Autism); and create scholarships for young people (4. Tiger Woods); those who use their money for foundations that help others (5. Troy Aikman); Players who inspire us not only by their skilled careers but by their grace filled lives, and even deaths (6. Lou Gehrig); There are those who dedicate themselves to teaching others that everyone is a winner (7. Muhammad Ali - Special Olympics). The spirit is not isolated to sports but can be seen providing counsel for those who have suffered abortions (8. Rachel’s’ Vineyard); those who tirelessly fought for justice (9. Martin Luther King) and those who continuously worked for Peace (10. Gandhi). The Spirit helps us discern how to use the gifts we have been given for God. So even if we too erect statues of our own modern day heroes in coliseums (11. Nolan Ryan in
Arlington Stadium-also a generous donor and foundation head) similar to Roman times; We have the spiritual freedom to reject unhealthy excess and violent attacks on human life. We are free to embrace our love of the game while admiring God-given athleticism. Furthermore, with the Holy Spirit’s guidance, we can celebrate treasured memories at the ball park ~ don’t forget the nachos! 1. http://www.udallas.edu/ministry/ ; http://www.udallas.edu/ministry/summerinstitute.cfm2. http://www.agassifoundation.org/3. http://www.tigerwoodsfoundation.org/4. http://www.danmarinofoundation.org/mari.html5. http://www.aikman.com/6. http://www.lougehrig.com/7. http://www.abilitymagazine.com/special_olympics.html8. http://www.rachelsvineyard.org/9. http://nobelprize.org/nobel_prizes/peace/laureates/1964/king-bio.html10. http://www.kamat.com/mmgandhi/gandhi.htm11. http://www.nolanryanfoundation.org/
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08-05-2008
Spiritually Fit
Normal?
What is spiritually fit normal? Is there really such a thing? I think Alicia Silverstone, in the movie Clueless, best articulates it by saying… “As If”!!! Recently, a friend and I were having a conversation about wanting the best for our children when she commented (as a single mom), “I just wish they could have a normal life.” I totally understood what she meant, but it got me thinking… What is normal?
According to the report, Feeling the Heat: “Global Warming and Rising Temperatures in the United States”, the average low temperature in Las Vegas in 2006 was 2.8 degrees above normal and 4.8 degrees above normal in the summer of that year. In 2008, the normal temperature broke the previous record set in 2006. (1) So what then is ‘normal’? Are we talking about ‘normal’ prior to 2006, or after?
Normal for 2008, or what ‘normal’ was in 2007? Do you mean the normal high, or the normal low? See what I mean! Lots of variables to consider – thus ‘normal’ is not as easily identified as what we might perceive. There is also no way to identify only one ‘normal’ temperature for the entire
United States cumulatively. The temperature in Anchorage today is projected to be 56 degrees- Vegas is projected to reach 107; hardly reasonable to try to merge the two into one normative temperature for the
U.S. (2, 3).
So, why in the world do we attempt to define a standard normalcy for families? Unless, of course, you are operating from ‘Cleaver Sociology’ : 2.5 kids (the .5 must be factoring the ‘normal’ weight gain after giving birth), one dog (probably not a pit-bull), a white picket fence (hopefully not too near the California fires), dinner on the table (not bags decorated with golden arches) the husband arrives home right on time at exactly 5 p.m., kids happily eat their vegetables, wife decked out in pearls, heals and a dress, full make-up and perfect hair (not sweats and a baseball cap) and her husband warmly greets her with a kiss accompanied by flowers. Dinner is followed by dad playing ball with his son in the front yard while mom and daughter happily knit. What was that again Alicia? That’s what I was thinking too! AS IFFFFF !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Clearly, we can’t begin to stereo-type a cumulative ‘normal’ for family life, nor would it make sense to even compare our own circumstances with anothers.
I will never forget when Jac had a grand mal seizure and we called 911. Later, riding in the ambulance to the hospital, the paramedic commented, “I don’t think I have ever seen a family respond so calmly under these circumstances - I guess this is pretty normal for y’all.” Although I don’t know if I could ever constitute my child convulsing with a seizure ‘normal’, I did realize there was some truth to what he pointed out. Although always scary, this was not that abnormal for our family. We all have our own reality of ‘normal’ thus there is never a need to compare. We all have our own set of circumstances, none identical to anothers, thus it frees us from the temptation to judge. Instead, we have the opportunity to be filled with compassion and reach out in service supporting one another.
Maybe ‘normal’ is over-rated anyway. A child born with special needs is categorized as ‘not-normal’, but we happen to know one who is a saint- that might not be normal, but it sure is cool! Other examples of the awesomeness of ‘not-normal’ include; a man walking on water demonstrating faith and another man who lost his job, giving to the homeless in charity; A woman saying ‘yes’ to God resulting in a miraculous birth; and another woman’s unplanned pregnancy resulting in an answer to prayer for a couple waiting to adopt. A man healing a hemorrhaging woman upon her touch; and another holding his wife’s hand throughout her journey with breast cancer; a 4 foot senior citizen living in a poverty stricken 3rd world country cleaning the oozing sores of lepers, and a single mom changing diapers, making dinner, driving carpool, paying bills, cleaning house, giving breathing treatments and rocking her children to sleep at night; The death penalty given to an innocent man resulting in his resurrecting from the dead, and the death of a hunched over aged balding man bringing together every religion in the known world for his funeral. Not-normal can often be holy opportunities for extraordinary expressions of love.
So the question no longer has to be ‘what is normal?’, and ‘how do I attain it?, but rather, ‘how can I make holy my current circumstances whether it be poverty, loneliness, uncertainty, illness, unemployment, disease, grief, or pain -normal or otherwise. My favorite quote is by Meister Eckhart:
“It is not what we do that makes us holy. We make holy what we do.”
I pray that today you experience holiness in your own version of ‘normal’ or ‘abnormal’, and throughout you are able to embrace God’s grace-filled presence and all encompassing love. Your life is holy - because you are holy!
Together in His Love, Tammy
References: 1. http://www.lasvegascitylife.com/articles/2007/07/26/news/shrapnel/iq_15684520.prt2. http://neondesert.com/serendipity/index.php?/archives/123-WARMEST-METEOROLOGICAL-SUMMER-ON-RECORD-AT-LAS-VEGAS.html3. http://www.alaska.com/about/weather/story/4481284p-4460281c.html
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05-30-2008
EMBRACING CHANGE
The one thing that is constant in all of our lives is change. For many of us (me) change is difficult (except when it is to our benefit such as a winning lottery ticket or something I want). I have never been great at embracing change immediately and seeing it for what it is… growth. I tend to wrestle it long before I accept its spiritual benefit. Moving to
Las Vegas was one example of change that I was slow to embrace.
In my state of wrestling, God led me to someone whom He would use to speak to me with holy wisdom. This new relationship would change my life. This godly man, filled with wisdom, knowledge and compassion became my spiritual director. When I went to visit him I would most often be filled with sorrow (still questioning God’s plan in bringing us to the desert). He would always guide me to a higher consciousness and inspire me with the WORD of God. In my spiritual desert, he helped keep me hydrated with holy water through his wise counsel, and through him I saw the reflection of Jesus. Each time I left his office, I had a gift… HOPE. He helped me to see my circumstances in the light of a loving God who is with us in all things, especially in change. Slowly, my perception began to shift and with the help of his holy nuggets of wisdom I began to embrace this change and the desert.
A few months back I found out that this person who had now become a rock in my life, a watering hole in the desert, and a channel I could hear God speak to me with great clarity, was leaving. Change…. GRRRRRR %$&^%#$*. Once again I sunk into grief, this was not a change I would be quick to embrace. Through my unrestrainable tears, my spiritual director allowed me to express my true feelings (sadness). He reminded me that we can’t leap frog our grief (Good Friday) and go straight into acceptance (Resurrection). It is important for all of us to have safe places to experience the entirety of our feelings (both good and bad ones).
Through my reflecting, I thought about how my move (that change I fought) led me to this person who inspired in me a deeper relationship with my Father. Now I was thanking God for the same change I had questioned Him about tirelessly. Through a holy relationship (given to me by God) I found a wellspring of love (in the desert) that would change my life for the better.
My instinct is still to wrestle change (What will I do without him? How will I hear God now?) My new awareness tells me that God will use this to grow me. Instead of wrestling God with ‘why’, I can be thankful for the gift He gave me by sending this person into my life when I was most in need. I can look forward to the ways God will continue to use this holy disciple whom I know will continue to channel God’s hope and light to others as I am also called to do. I am reminded (that although painful at times), God’s love for us co-exists in change. I also realize that I have a choice… I can wrestle or I can trust; I can fight or I can accept; I can continuously question or I can seek God in the newness. I am learning that although tears are a healthy part of the process, that an incredible experience of God is awaiting me as I learn to EMBRACE CHANGE.
In gratitude for Fr. Mark Serna (Please keep him in your holy prayers as he faithfully returns to his monastery in
Rhode Island).
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05-30-2008
Peace in the Chaos
Each of us face challenges, that is just the reality of our human condition. At times we can feel backed into a corner, helpless and left questioning… Why??? What? How?
I confess, I don’t immediately go to a place of gratitude when I am faced with pain or challenge, I usually spin awhile, and yes question. Due to my inability to get out of my own head during such times, God sends me hope in the voice of wise spiritual counsel (the HS) and in holy friends accompanying me on the journey. It is often through their faith I find hope I can cling to, that which helps guide me through the fog & chaos and guides me toward the light.
This past weekend we were at mass with my friend Tracie who was visiting from
Dallas. As we settled into our chairs, Jac began to have intense seizures (one on top of the other). There was hardly room in the pew for him to sprawl out on me as he was attempting to do in his discomfort, so I got up to take him somewhere he could lie down. When I stood to leave with Jac, Brooke (Mama’s girl) began to scream and cry uncontrollably; “Mommy, mommy, I want my mommy!” With all eyes on us now, in what was formerly a somewhat quiet sanctuary, Instinctively, Tracie (single mama of five) swooped Brooke into her arms and headed for the nearest exit.
I settled onto the floor in a back corner of the church and held Jac as he laid ontop of me jerking erratically. My head was spinning (Is Tracie okay with Brooke? Is Brett okay with Josh and Luke? Why is Jac having so many seizures? Is he going to be okay?) At the sign of peace a woman (who had been watching us and sending over occasional glances of compassion) walked toward us, leaned over (since we were still on the floor unable to get up) and put her hand on my head. She blessed me without saying a word. I looked up at her fighting back the tears in my eyes and saw her doing the same thing. That eye connection was one of the most intimate exchanges I remember receiving during the sign of the peace. With the blessing of her hands, her gentle touch, and her soul-full eyes, she was extending to me unconditional peace. This is peace that co-exists with chaos. Not a peace that is only experienced when I am sitting by the ocean listening to the calm of the waves, or when I’m praying in silence, or when my life is sailing along without ruffle, but true peace – peace that exists in the chaos. That kind of peace ignites hope. Hope I might not always feel, but I am learning more and more that I can trust in.
Following communion , as I was praying (talking to God), I found myself back in a place of questioning. (“How in the world do you expect me to do all this, to handle it all?”) It was then I heard His gentle whisper, “but you didn’t have to- did you?” I realized in that moment that God had sent us help and hope. He sent Tracie reminding me that He will always provide, always send me what I need, and never ask me to go it alone. He also sent me the compassionate woman at communion, who reminded me of connected compassion, a physical extension of peace in the chaos. I could have easily missed these God encounters as I was entangled in my own spinning chaotic mind. But God revealed something else to me (even in my questioning), that I (we) are not alone. He sends us help, He gives us hope and when we allow ourselves to stop questioning and to take a break from spinning, then we can experience peace in the chaos.
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05-30-2008
Made of Honor??? Not so much!
I’m not Siskel, Ebert, Roeper, or a famous movie critic, but I might be able to save you a few bucks and your time if you read on…
I had the privilege of having some of my girlfriends visit this week. (Because I have a GREAT husband, who is also an awesome guest columnist), we were able to sneak off for the rare opportunity to catch a chic flick. One of my friends has a thing for Patrick Dempsey so she chose the movie Made of Honor. Although I knew little about it, I did know that the premise was about a boy realizing he had feelings for his best friend. I like the story line since I too married my best friend. I was also pretty much just glad to have a chance to go to the movies with my girls! What I did not expect was how bad a movie it might be. Because it is so challenging to finally carve out time and your life savings to attend a movie, it sorda feels like a kick in the gut when it’s this bad. Just because I care about you and want to save you the brutal beating my wallet and time took I will offer you the following considerations.
First of all, there is the predictable script: Boy meets girl, she is disinterested, they become best friends. (Thanks, we already saw it in My Best Friends Wedding). Boy and girl stay friends, he can’t see what is right in front of him so opts for meaningless sex. (BTW: women don’t appreciate being portrayed as mindless, immoral, objects). The girl leaves town and the boy misses her. He processes this with his buddies on the basketball court (stereotypical male bonding). The worst part of the movie (for me) was when the ‘so called’ successful group of friends shoots hoops while a supposed ‘geek’ tries desperately to be included. It was like watching high school all over again except no one grew up. They treated this guy condescendingly, rudely and in all ways like they were better than him and the audience was meant to laugh with them, at him. I kept thinking to myself how the script MUST be working in a storyline that would lead the ‘so called’ cool, successful, wealthy, handsome, guys to have some sort of conversion because of this unique individual… ummmm, sadly that does is not what happens. Throughout the movie they berated and belittled him and continued to expect the audience to laugh. We didn’t. I would have left but I kept thinking surely it would get better, I was mistaken. The girl returns from her trip and the boy plans to surprise her to profess his love, although the surprise is that she is engaged (saw it already on friends w/ Ross and Rachel). The only surprise in the movie for me was how bad it continuously got. I questioned how in the world it made it to the big screen and how innocent people were tricked into paying money towards it. Females were continuously depicted in condescending ways. An overweight girl starves herself and ends up ripping her dress (not funny), a girl who is bitter, hurt and a supposed floozy hits throws herself on the groom (not funny), a grandma who mistakes a sex toy for a necklace and a priest notices (not funny), men portrayed as uncaring, chauvinistic , egotistical women users full of rules and game playing (not funny).
I was so disturbed by the way people (all people) were treated throughout the movie in relation to human dignity. When will movie makers get that we are not impressed by innumerable sexual conquests? We are sick of seeing women portrayed as mindless, immoral bimbos, and men as uncaring, egotistical bigots. We are offended when those who might have special needs are outwardly persecuted and ridiculed. The word ‘retard’ means developmentally delayed. Please stop abusing it and using it for any other purpose than referring to our special needs community with love and compassion. The real world is hard enough, we don’t want to go to the movies to see injustice celebrated and worse, have to pay for it!
I am not in any way trying to be a moral judge, but I admit I felt completely offended watching this movie and it was not my self righteousness at work, rather I know it was my Holy Spirit! It was that indwelling which is able to discern holiness and that was grieving the dishonorable display of human dignity. How can any of us sit and watch people be cruel to one another and not feel anything, or worse yet- to laugh without sensitivity? When that happens we are in trouble. The spirit within all of us is continuously calling us to higher ground. Let’s hope someone in
Hollywood gets the message and they realizes that Made of Honor – is anything but honorable.
The honorable thing to do would be to give everyone their money back!
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